Thursday, October 29, 2009

Good dad/Bad dad

This post is about a song I wrote called Good "Dad/ Bad Dad". It's about my son Randy and daughter Jade. Every one knows my son because he's always with me. Whether its the studio, on stage at shows, in meetings, sleep in the back of my office, etc. But no one knows my daughter. Reason is I'm very absent in her life. I've only seen her a handful of times. Enough for her to know I'm daddy but not enough to really matter. The song is about the good relationship me and my son have and the bad one me and my daughter have.

If you know Randy then you know his mom Face. I made it a point early in my "career" to let people know who they were through songs, pics, etc.
My son's done more shows then a lot of these so called rappers lol. We have more than a father/son relationship. That's my nigga lol. His only gone probably 3 days without seeing me his whole life and that's because I was in Vegas and he couldn't go.

My son was pretty much planned, where as my daughter wasn't. She's a result of me being unfaithful and stepping back into something with an ex. I'd never deny her. If you asked how many kids I have, I'd tell you. But I also don't tell people about her off top. Mainly because then I have to explain why she's never around or how she came to be. She's cute as shit tho. And smart. As much as I can't stand her mom, she's doing a good job on that end. Her mom makes sure to show her my videos and pictures and when I had my cell on, if Jade wanted to she would call me. Only one of my friends has seen her and that was once. My mom has seen her maybe 4 times. I didn't really see her all summer during my whole "get money" thing. I think about her daily and will be stepping the daddy side up as part of my SELF REHAB. There is no excuse for not being there bottom line.

I'll post the lyrics to the song later when I find em on

UPDATE! Here the lyrics go:
My son sees me everyday of his life//
My first born, my first name, its only right//
Daddy's baby, my lil soldier//
I try to be stern, but I'mma push ova//
I take him everywhere, office and the studio//
He even be on stage when I do my shows//
He knows the words to all songs//
We be eating pizza, watching movies all night long//
I put him to sleep, brush his hair and his teeth in the morning time//
He looks just like me, no denying the boy is mine//
He listens to me, I demand my respect//
Got his name birthday tatted on my neck//
I taught him how to say thank u and please//
I kiss his boo boos when he scrapes his knees//
When he does good, I give him daps and high fives//
I call him Big Baby Ran, that's my lil guy//

I'm a man//
My balls and my word is all I have//
But I'm sad//
Cuz my daughter calls another nigga dad//
Cuz she don't see me often//
I gotta deal with her momma shit talking//
Everytime I walk in, I'm treated like a stranger//
On the real, I really can't blame her//
I be gone for months at a time//
But baby Jade still on my mind//
I wish I could be there 24/7//
But I can't, I'm on the grind, on a mission//
I'm trynna turn nothing into something out here//
But all she sees is that I'm not there//
And I promise, I'mma make you proud of me//
To you I'm dad, but to the world I'm C dot V//


What's good ya'll. Im back. Its Day 32. Been staying busy. Dipset West
album will be out on Thanksgiving so I've been putting energy into that.
Trynna set up release parties and endorsements deals. Lots of progress
on that/ is back up. Just posted a interview I did with Street
Goddess from Top Dawg Ent. She's head of promo for them and just a all
around hustler. It was a real good interview we did months ago but I
never posted it. I added new music too. I want to change the layout
because its too basic. Need something more along the lines of

I'm on my way to quit my flower delivery job. I just got a new marketing
job so YAY me. I start at 12 and its full time.

I've been wanting to smoke kinda badly lately. Almost bought a black n
mild a few times but eventually I didn't. Doing really well on that
side, just quitting cold turkey.

Still haven't been recording. Haven't looked into it at all either. But
I got some shit ready. One of my ACES CLIK members is flying in from NY
sat and we are gonna link up and record. I always like collabing.

Not much Best Coast biz going on still. Just thinking it out til I have
money to make moves. But trust it will be up and running. That's my baby

My mac is broken so I haven't been able to do as much work as usual. Was
gonna sell it but since I have a new job, I'll just get it fixed.

I'm back in the gym. Been away for pretty much 2 months with the
exception of a couple days. I'm paying all this money, I might as well
go. Felt good. I'mma go as often as possible. Be the yuffest businessman
lol. And yes I do mean Yuff. Gotta work on the legs as much as the upper
body. Its too many niggas who buff grom the waist up with chicklen legs

All in all I'm doing better but can do better. That's it for now.


Saturday, October 17, 2009


What's good? I'm back. I'mma just start writing these self rehab blogs when something pivotal happens because some days nothing will happen. Just been busy as always. Looking for a new night job. I used to always stay with 2 jobs....atleast 2 lol. Being at The Palmer Room spoiled me because I got to experience being my on boss. I wasn't meant to have a boss. I have a big problem with authority. Blame it on the "seen but not heard" childhood. I took my son for his very 1st haircut which for a dad was real big to me lol. Me or FACE always cuts his hair. Speaking of FACE, I have to publicly apologize to her. I've shitted on her in these blogs a couple times when talking about relationships and what not. Arguements/shit talking/part time hate aside, I'd kick a nigga down a flight of stairs blind folded if she asked me without hesitation because I know she'd have a good reason lol.

Dipset West is moving along nicely. Videos are coming back from editing. I run the dipsetwest.wordpress blog. The street album drops this month. I'm setting up mass amounts of release parties in different areas like the bay, arizona, la, etc. We are so ahead of the game on the west because no artist out here put out albums, just mixtapes. I guarantee every artist on the label will have a instore album because that's just how Dipset works.

I've got the urge to back to be an artist. I've got alot of concept songs these days and the funny thing is every song I picture the video to go with it.

I'm crazy sick right now and its super interrupting my work. Body just sore and weak. Got the sudafed on deck tho lol. I get sick about once a year. Usually when the weather turns from hot one day to cold the next.

Anyway, I'm off. got work to do. I'll be posting more today tho.


Monday, October 12, 2009


What's good? Day 7 was busy. I ran through my deliveries as quick as possible because I had errands to run. Had to go by a venue and see if they had end of the month dates open. They did but wanted a deposit that I didn't have lol. That cancelled my plans to have tickets made before it got to late because other wise I'd have to wait til monday. No I have to wait anyway because I didn't have a venue and was gonna spend the weekend looking. Not much else went down. Cashed my check and went by sprint to find out I have a $300 phone bill before my blackberry gets turned back on. Needless to say, I didn't make enough to turn it back on right now lol. Will be on no later than next month tho. I did some more writing on my screen play. I really like where this is going. That's it for now. Real light

Saturday, October 10, 2009


What's good? Today I stopped by the gym to try and figure out why they trynna charge me more. I haven't been in forever. They said we can work out a deal if I bring the letter they mailed to me in and let me work out. Man, I looked in the mirror and finally realized how much muscle I lost. I'm def gonna start going a few times a week.

I passed by my moms house while working. Haven't talked to her since some time in the summer. I'm vicious when it comes to holding grudges lol. Terrible trait but oh well.

I decided to email every studio I can find so I can get a internship. No point in wasting all the knowledge and money spent at school to become a recording engineer. I was a straight A student. I haven't mixed a song down in forever on my own.

I worked on a screenplay that I haven't touched in forever. Like 2 months. I want to shoot this by the end of the year. It's going to be soo goood! I wrote it to be low cost to shoot. Only a couple locations, 4 characters and can probably shot it in one or two nights.

Something else productive happened but I can't remember what it is....give me a minute. Yea I can't remember what it is, I'm out. Peace

Thursday, October 8, 2009


Waddup ya'll. Today was slow. Alot of driving. Kinda feel like shit and I don't know why. I'm upbeat right now tho lol. Today I worked on my freestyle while on my long drive through malibu and santa monica. That is something I need to get stronger. I want to get to the point that my freestyle sounds like writtens. Today was just real internal. I decided today to stop drinking soda. Nothing good in that at all.

I'm just ready to own shit. Car, house, etc. And I'm ready to put things in order to do all that. I'm very much a family man and they deserve better than what I'm offering now. that being said, I'm cutting no slack. If you owe me money I'm coming for that shit. WORD! I've been real timid with companies but I'mma start making myself known and heard. Iceman says he's gonna show me how to muscle people lol.

I'm out for now. peace


Yo, I'm back. Day 4 was productive. I finally turned in the paperwork to get insurance. That was so long over due. I'll find out if I qualify in a week or so. I need that to finally take care of this damn tooth. Getting that bad boy pulled ASAP. It was my day off so I got alot done. It's my only week day off. Actually sat down and made phone calls. I honestly hate making calls. I don't like how sound on the phone. Real unsure of myself. I say "umm" alot. I'm making it a point to call now before emailing. I need faster results.

I've just been doing alot of thinking. Trynna figure out a work out schedule. I need to bulk up. I'm putting together end of the month shows. I emailed about some promo shit. I really want to get another in house promotions gig. Been thinking about bringing in one or two partners. Not sure if I want help with my biz or just people to split office rent with.

That's all I got for now. Peace

Tuesday, October 6, 2009


Aight, so Day 3 was coo'. I had to go to Pepperdine University for a drop off and it just really reinforced my want to go back to school. I'm a recording engineer graduate from the Musicians Institute but I want a 4 year degree.

I've been listening to Blueprint 3 and I love it. It's reinspired me as an artist and I've been writing some ill shit. BP3 and So Far Gone are the only things on repeat in my blackberry. I stay murdering ink/the memo section on my blackberry lol

Speaking of blackberry, mine just turned off a few days ago and didn't come back on. I got super worried that I lost everything because I didn't back it up on my mac and sprint doesn't give sim cards in their phones. So like 2 days later it just came back on and I immediately backed it up on my mac.

I've just been thinking out new moves. Need to get my team together. I need to get a team lol.

I think that's it for today. Peace

Monday, October 5, 2009


What's good ya'll. Right now we are in the morning of Day 3. Day 2 was slow but I decided to stop smoking for good. YAY ME! Weed is still very much in play tho. Just no more black and milds. I got some work done and hopefully within the next couple days it turns into a big pay check. I'm already mentally spending it. I honestly didn't do much yesterday but sit on the computer. That's good and bad. I have some footwork I need to do and calls to make. I'll do them tomorrow on my day off.

So far my self rehab will include working out, working smarter no harder, treating myself better. That all sounds good, right? I'mma ad more to it tonight

Time to get ready for work. I'll give you the day 3 wrap up sometime tonight or first thing tomorrow morning.

Saturday, October 3, 2009


Been M.I.A. lately. Got a new job delivering flowers and it takes up my whole day when I do it. Which is leaving no time for entreprenuer biz. I feel like everyday I lose part of the man I spent all year becoming. I was so business oriented. I had non stop shit popping, had money in my pocket, was dressing better, had a car for a hot sec, always performing, even started back recording and other shit I can't remember right now lol. Oh and a office. Now I'm just work jobs all day. It's very frustrating. I've found that I real problem with authority. It's time to go back to being my own boss. I'm starting a process I'm calling SELF REHAB. Everyday I will update you on my quest to better myself. let's see how that goes!

so far today I've gotten back to as much biz as possible from a computer. Need to get my phone back on and a office. I just was emailed a list of offices available. I'm not gonna look at it til I have money for it tho.

Tonight I'll be up all night going over new shit for Dipset West and writing on some screen plays. and figuring out the rest of my self rehab. I'll update ya'll tomorrow.